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At this point in the day, most folks will be dressed or partially dressed for the wedding, or may choose to wear a separate outfit from what they plan to wear for the wedding. The gesture symbolizes throwing away her bad temper before entering marriage. After the tea ceremony, the good fortune woman will lead the bride to the room.
Its customary for the bride to wear a red satin or silk dress for the tea ceremony with gold accents and gold jewelry.
But my favorite is probably to make sure the tea is at a warm, optimal temperature, so there isnt any burnt tongues or the dreaded blowing to cool the tea. Lotus Seeds (, linz): These also represent fertility, or the hope of having many sons/children in the future.
It means: I am marrying into this family, I will show my respect by serving tea to the elders, adds Au. Other relatives can help with putting on the jewelry. When Sarah was planning her wedding, one of the biggest questions on our minds was the Chinese wedding tea ceremony part of the day. We had 5 of us on deckme, Kaitlin, plus our 4 cousins, Chris, Jen, Steph, and Kim. give her the bridal bouquet after he and the best men pass the tests and usher the bride into the hall. Performing the ring ceremonyThe bride will come out of the room and sit on a high chair, while her legs should put on a short chair. Returning of giftsAfter receiving the betrothal gifts from the groom, the bride will have to give some gifts as well. of uncleanness and shattering one's willfulness. After the newlyweds enter the hall, the officiators from the groom's family will accompany them to make offerings to the groom's ancestors. the bride's home accompanied by the matchmaker. 5. The water-splashing ritual takes place behind the bridal car. One of the brides younger male relatives should open the door for the groom, and carry a water basin for the groom to wash and wipe his hands. The groom should assist the bride get out by supporting her together with the matchmaker, who will be holding a rice sieve (or a black umbrella) above the newlyweds' heads and escorting the bride into the Translation, if some of your tea attendants are on the clumsy side, maybe give them another job! their loving care and upbringing.
We wanted to make sure it was done right.
There are couples who choose to only do so before their parents and in-laws and not for other relatives, which is something they will usually have a consensus with their families about. hall of the house. Its an Italian brand called Chiara Boni.
Its not entirely up to the couple, though. Sarah and Justin went the slightly more modern route with a peony-print high-neck red dress, and a charcoal suit with a red tie. The groom's family will prepare and place the six gifts in wedding chests on the wedding day and load them onto the car (if betrothal and wedding ceremonies are held on the same day). Then it would be best to put it on straight away so as not to offend. Tea is offered individually by both the bride and groom.
Another popular choice is candied lotus seeds.
I am proud to say that your genealogy has been the sole tutorial for my Asian-inspired culinary adventures for years; probably since you began. presented by the groom's family and place them inside red wooden wedding chests brought by the groom's family. Its a touching symbol of the coming together of two families and it gives the couple the opportunity to acknowledge the people who helped raise them. the car, she should gently touch the tangerines and switch their places before placing a red envelope under one of them as a form of reciprocation. The parents and in-laws are the key recipients, and sometimes other relatives such as grandparents, aunts and uncles will also take part. 1. In the end, though, everything went smoothly, and even our 102-year-old great grandma was very happy with all the wedding activities! Delivering the betrothal giftsA tribute officer (usually the grooms uncle) will take betrothal gifts from the car. 6. So we thought it was a good time to break down an important Chinese traditionthe Chinese wedding tea ceremonyfor couples out there who are in the midst of planning their celebrations. So this is our definitive guide, fresh in our minds from earlier this summer for anyone looking to conduct a Chinese wedding tea ceremony!
As you can see from the photos, we are not all too formal of a family! dressed The couple and their families select these based on the Chinese almanac, or consultations with Feng Shui specialists. Journal for Early Modern Cultural Studies. Eating glutinous rice ballsThe groom's family will enjoy glutinous rice balls prepared by the bride. Before their departure, a firecracker will be ignited to symbolize the start of the ceremony. There are no rules surrounding this and people choose based on personal preference, says Au.
The father of the groom is served by the groom, then by the bride. Read our, The History and Meaning of the Tea Ceremony.
You can prepare the first batch of tea in advance, but you will likely need more, so adjust water temperature accordingly. This is important for the couple to discuss with their parents and family beforehand, so there arent any awkward or confused silences! A Chinese red tea (known in the West as a black tea) is a safe, crowd-pleasing choice. 11. Andrea Lo is a Hong Kong-based freelance journalist specializing in local culture, food and drink, travel, design, and architecture. Tap here to receive our FREE top 25 recipe book! have photographs with the entire family and friends. Immediately following the ceremony, the parents will usually offer a few wise words to the couple and give them lai seered envelopes containing cash, a symbol of luck and good fortune.
4. However, in Chinese tradition, the Tiger zodiac sign conflicts with wedding events.
The matchmaker usually introduces the grooms side to the bride first, then followed by the brides side to the groom. Let's dive deeper into the processes of the engagement ceremony in Taiwan: 1. Therefore, if any of the two mothers belong to this zodiac sign, she should not touch the couple. Symbolizing the union of two families, it is a meaningful part of the day, typically taking place inside the couples respective family homes. While both families can agree on the amount, the groom usually needs to pay for the tables of the grooms side and take on a lucky number. Performing the tea ceremonyThe brides family will invite the groom and his family to sit according to their seniority, with the groom sitting at the farthest side. This also allowed room for family members to stand and watch. 3. I always enjoy your recipes and articles. In modern times, dai kum jeh also act as Chinese wedding consultants. The cup should always be offered with both hands, as a sign of respect. After drinking the sweet tea, the drinker should place a red You can order them on websites like aliexpress.com. She will also ignite a firecracker to welcome the grooms party. When the two sides exchange their wedding rings, the good fortune woman will say words with auspicious meanings. Particularly if everyone you want to participate in the tea ceremony will be at the rehearsal dinner. We provide couples with comprehensive wedding planning information, planning tools, and tons of wedding inspiration! I declare that I am a wedding professional. I am 3rd generation Chinese American, and so refreshing to see this observed by younger brides.
envelope under the tea cup for the bride to collect later. The groom's entourage will unload the wedding gifts in the car and present them to the bride's family and relatives while an elder from the bride's family leads the groom's entourage into the living room. The origins of the tea ceremony go as far back as the Tang dynasty in China (618-907).
After the newlyweds enter the room, they will sit side by side, which symbolizes their union, their sharing of future ups Its also an expression of gratitude from the couples part. Heres a sample of how things could go: As for exactly how the tea is served, there is etiquette involved. Do the tea drinkers have to finish the tea in their cup?
When bridesmaids enter the bridal room, the groom will give them red envelopes. Hello! For more than 2 individuals (i.e. Both families are involved to officially acknowledge the engagement and give their blessings, and the couple will exchange grand gifts during the engagement ceremony, before proceeding to plan the wedding. No one has time or the inclination to sit there and blow on their tea so it can cool.
Dried Longan (, guyun): These represent wholeness, completeness, and esteem. Symbolic imagery with the pairing of a dragon and phoenix is also ideal.
There was also a table for placing the tea set and gifts. The bride's mother-in-law will put gold jewelries on the bride as a way of greeting and accepting the bride. From the groom's Im looking ahead to 2 weddings, and Sarah already has 3 dates saved in her calendar! And as for lei-si, you should prepare 2, 1 for bride and 1 for groom at the tea ceremony.
Facing the family shrine, men stand on The bride and groom then go down the line of the group of family members until everyone has been served. The wedding day is packed with a lot of things, can the bride & groom have the Tea Ceremony during the rehearsal dinner which would be the night before the wedding day? When and downs as well as prosperity and wealth. 12 Chinese Wedding Traditions You Need to Know, AAPI Couples On Celebrating Their Love and Traditions at Their Weddings, Ringing in the Vows: AAPI Wedding Pros on Love, Tradition, Culture, and Heritage, 13 Filipino Wedding Traditions You Need to Know, A Grand, Multi-Day Wedding with an Intimate Guest List in Florence, 9 Korean Wedding Traditions You Need to Know, 16 Mexican Wedding Traditions You Need to Know, An Easy Breakdown of Wedding Ceremony Outline, 10 Christian Wedding Ceremony Traditions You Need to Know, Everything You Need to Know About the Korean Paebaek Ceremony, 10 Common Wedding-Related Events and Parties to Know About, 43 Fascinating Wedding Traditions From Around the World. This is said to bring fertility to the couple. When the bridal car is about the depart, the bride will throw out a paper fan (with a red envelope and a handkerchief tied to the end of the fan) for her younger brother or sister to pick it up. Otherwise, its seen as rude, or as if she didnt like them., When planning a tea ceremony, speak to your families about who you want to include.
The matchmaker will feed them sweet soup with glutinous rice balls, longans and red dates, which denotes the sweet The groom will give him a red packet afterwards.
In our case, because the brides side is Chinese, our original plan was to do the brides family first, but at one point, some of our side was running late, so we just started with Justins family. Chinese-style teaware and cushions (for the couple to kneel comfortably on) are usually used, with the "double happiness" Chinese characterwhich symbolizes weddingsprinted on them. If I am giving the bride jewelry, and a lei-si. :) Thanks for your kind words. She will also give a young child from the groom's family a chicken leg tied with red paper, as well as a red packet. The more the merrier when it comes to the jewelry! A smaller amount of lucky money may be given in addition to a larger amount as an overall wedding gift.. I really love how youve planned ahead and had basically a team of people in the background to help make the process run smoothly. Leaving the grooms placeAfter the groom worships his ancestors, he and his family will carry the betrothal gifts before heading to the brides place. There is no set time for this, says Au. When the tea was ready, Jen filled the ceremonial pot in the kitchen and walked it back to the tea ceremony room as the tea ceremony was already in progress. conducting "nazai," the groom's family will prepareMORE. Meanwhile, the groom and his relatives should put a red packet into their empty teacups and then put it on the tea tray, which is called, red packet as dowry. The bride will then collect the teacups. As long as there are a lot of colorful candies, red envelopes, fruits, nuts, a red dress, and some laughter, Id consider it a successful and happy tea ceremony. kindness and reciprocate with gifts such as soaps. The bride's mother will splash a bowl or a basin of water (or rice) towards the back of the car, indicating there are no regrets as splashed water cannot be undone. After double-checking the items, cars and entourage, the groom will get properly Kaitlin, thank you so much for this post! It has given me plenty of insight for organizing a tea ceremony for my daughters up coming wedding.
Im glad we could bring back some good memories :) :) :). Then, the groom can lift the bridal veil, and the newlyweds will have a sip of wine with their arms intertwined. Learn how your comment data is processed. Then the next group takes their seats and is served tea. My mom bought red double happiness decorations to hang and a tea set from China months ahead of time. Then the tea ceremony can take place with each side of the family. The couple, their parents, and close family members such as grandparents, aunts, and uncles. In some modern Chinese weddings, the tea ceremony remains one of the most significant traditions, where the newlyweds show their respect to the elders in their families, and they in turn show their acceptance of the marriage. What goes in the tea? Otherwise, one of the two will boss the other around after the wedding.
You dont need a dai kum jeh for this, though. Its so important to keep these traditions alive and I know it was a crash course for us so we had to share! In Hong Kong, where the majority of weddings feature a blend of Chinese and western customs, the tea ceremony for the brides side is conducted at her family home in the morning, when tradition calls for the groom and his groomsmen to go and pick her up. Plus, Sarah is the first of our generation of cousins to get married, so there werent many references to go to when Sarah was in the thick of wedding planning! as a wedding gift. With tea being such a big part of Chinese culture, this is hardly a surprise, but theres more to this elegant ceremony than just a love of the infusions. Best wishes for lifelong happiness together :). "daughter-in-law. A Ketubah is a Jewish marriage contract signed by the couple and two witnesses. The number of wedding cars can be 2 to 6, while the number of people in each car should be even; however, the numbers 4 and 8 should be avoided.
Theres no need for extra chairs for sitting unless there are elderly family members present. She will take some part of the gifts, while the rest are returned to the groom. Worshipping ancestors After the brides family receives the betrothal gifts, the good fortune woman will ignite joss sticks in front of the ancestor tablets and hand them over to the parents of the bride, the groom and the bride. MORE. After that, the grooms parents will offer the bride gold jewelry, most notably dragon and phoenix bangles, a traditional wedding accessory. However, with all the hustle and bustle of weddings today, more likely than not, the whole thing takes place in one location.
The groom's family will set off a long roll of firecrackers to welcome the bride as the bridal fleet move closer to the destination. Then I (Kaitlin) poured the tea into the cups for the next round of relatives, and Kim and I passed the tea to Sarah and Justin. This is because traditionally, the bride was absorbed into the mans family and was recognized as such first by the grooms family.
", The bride's uncle will light the incense for the newlyweds and the family to make offerings to the bride's ancestors. Typically a woman, the dai kum jeh guides the bride in navigating through customs. If your mother-in-law wanted you to kneel, then you wouldn't want to say no to that, says Au. Were Bill, Judy, Sarah, and Kaitlin a family of four cooks sharing our home-cooked and restaurant-style recipes. It usually happens at the homes of the bride and groom (brides family at the brides home and grooms family at the grooms home). The groom and the matchmaker should get out of the bridal car first. The newlyweds then bid farewell to the bride's parents and express gratitude for
A stovetop or electric kettle for boiling water and brewing the tea. Most of the men wore suits or collared shirts, with the women opting for slightly more casual summer dresses. According to Sharon Au, drinking that tea symbolizes the parents not only recognizing but also accepting a new person into the family.
A TWOL Wedding: Sarah & Justin Get Married! family, a boy should be holding a red wedding tray with two large tangerines wrapped with red paper, greeting the bride and politely welcoming her out of the bridal car. The groom will put a ring on the right middle finger of the bride and the bride will also put a ring on his right middle finger. (Read about the door games in Sarahs wedding post.)
1-2 hours, depending on the size of the family. Some say that the gold jewelry should be put on right away, but it may be enclosed in the red envelopes along with money, and its not strictly necessary unless someone is presenting it outright.
In the bridal room, two chairs should be arranged in advance, with the groom's black pants put on one of the chair and coins and notes placed under them. A tea ceremony is a Chinese tradition wherein the bride and groom serve tea to their respective families, including parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles, and other esteemed elders. To indicate reciprocation, the bride's family will perform the etiquette called "Hui Sheng " (or "Ya Sheng "), meaning they return part of the betrothal gifts
9. After 2020, theres a huge backlog of delayed nuptials set to happen over the next two years. Moreover, the bride should not look backwards during the process. A funny question that came up often in preparing for the tea ceremony was what the appropriate Chinese honorifics for various family members were. She will also put her gifts all together and present them to the groom. If desired, you can augment the tea with dried Chinese fruits like nuts and dates and dried herbal flower teas for extra flavor. Of course, I will give a bigger lei-si (?) The officiators will inform the gods which family member is getting married on that day and pray for gods and ancestors to bless and protect his family with lasting prosperity and domestic Sarah and Justin then offered the tea to the tea drinkersi.e., the family members taking part in the ceremony. We did ours in 45 minutes. ), Step 1: Everyone assembles where the tea ceremony is being held, Step 2: Opening statement from parents of the bride and/or groom (or potentially an officiant). ), Tea drinkers (the family members being recognized! We did dig out the family heirlooms in terms of gold jewelry. I cant remember exactly wherebought it over a year ago now.
Im so glad you found it helpful, Yuet!
Youll also need space for the couple to kneel on pillows in front of the chair, which is the customary and most respectful way for the tea to be served. She will present the tea to the groom and his relatives, while calling them by their formal title, for example, Grandfather, please drink tea.The bride will retreat to the room until the tea is finished. Handler-Spitz, R.Seeking Truth and Exposing Falsehood in Early Modern Prose Collections, or Seeing Faces in Pansies? Well done! Here are 5 Kua () Designs that We Love! During the tea ceremony, the bride and groom should each face the relative of their gender (there are no rules about which side the couple needs to be on).
harmony. Are there preferred types of tea? Thank you so much, Marilyn!
Seeking Truth and Exposing Falsehood in Early Modern Prose Collections, or Seeing Faces in Pansies. She goes on to note that this is especially so for the grooms side of the family. (As is the case with many Chinese wedding traditions, the grooms family takes precedence over the brides.) The banquet marks the perfect ending of the betrothal ritual. Introducing both familiesThough both families have probably met each other before the engagement, the matchmaker will still introduce the families and relatives of both sides. Its important for the bride to put these on right away, advises Au. Ideally, you want nicer chairs for the tea drinkers to sit in. The bride should sit on a high chair facing outward with her feet resting on a small, round stool in the hall of the house (if the groom is to bear the bride's family name, then the bride should face inward). The banquetAfter the ceremony is completed, the bride will hold an engagement banquet for the guests; the groom will pay part of the expenditure with a red packet. The ancient role, literally big aunt-sister in Cantonese and dubbed bridal chaperone in English by Au, was once an indispensable part of southern Chinese weddings. This is called "Bai Jiao" (literally translated as "bow to the palanquin"). Red Dates (, hngzo): These add sweetness to the tea and symbolize the sweetness of the couples marriage, as well as prosperity and good fortune. ! Address the family members you are serving tea to in kinship terms, and hand them the teacup with both hands. Sarah also wore a deep green jade bangle that Justins mom had acquired on her travels to China many years ago. After a brief rest, the newlyweds can I have been looking everywhere for a modest red dress and cant find one that I love. Do I give something (jewelry) to the groom? The Chinese tea ceremony was included in rehearsals the day before the wedding.
A Chinese tea set something red and cheerful with a double happiness character () is ideal. Sarah runs a tight itinerary! Our cousins Chris and Steph were in the kitchen brewing the tea and washing cups. Others might choose to go without it altogether. The Chinese tea ceremony is conducted on the day of the wedding and sees the bride and groom serve tea to their parents, in-laws, and other family members. I assisted Sarah and Kim assisted Justin. Again, with modern day and multicultural weddings, you should certainly feel free to put your own spin on traditions that feel right for you! Upon the end of the banquet, the grooms side should leave first. This can also be an opportunity to give the primary wedding gift, but it does not have to be. 7. The bridal party is usually present, and bridesmaids often act as attendantsmaking the tea, handing over teacups to the couples for them to present to their relatives, washing the teaware. On the flipside, its an opportunity for those close family members to personally and formally express their happiness, best wishes, and congratulations to the couple. Not to mention Sarah got married back in June! Led by the "Hao Ming Po" (literally translated as the lady with a good life), the bride will hold the tea tray with both hands to serve sweet tea to the groom's family and relatives and greet them one by one. We also moved furniture out of the way to clear a space for chairs where the tea drinkers would sit. 8. Thank you for such an informative article. Kaitlin opted for a nice dress, but subbed fuzzy slippers instead of heels!
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